So damn lazy

I’ve had so much homework, so I’ve been skipping my various ass-kicking classes.  Well, two of them this week.  Not too bad, I suppose.  Except I’ve been writing boring papers instead of working out/beating ass.  My little row of post-it notes is getting steadily shorter, though!  Success!

Did do a nice amount of sparring on Saturday, though, mainly with Rosie.  We’re well-matched, so it was really fun to spar together.  We were also practicing trash-talking with each other.  I think I’m too nice to be a good trash-talker.  Oh well!  We were doing a lot of practice with the clinch, learning how to escape the clinch and immediately lock your opponent up in your own clinch.  So Rosie and I decided to try to see how long we could keep going with an uninterrupted chain of clinches.  Rosie would get me, then I’d get her, then she’d get me… I think we had up to five or six in a row before we gave up.  Anyway, now I have this ideal of the Eternal Clinch.  It’s where warriors go when they die.  It’s like poetry, because I don’t understand poetry.

Went clubbing Saturday night.  I learned that people who go clubbing with leg casts receive lots of high fives.  As for me, I was planning on having bare legs because clubs are hot and sweaty, but I realized when I had my dress on that my legs were all bruised.  Dang!  The life of a lady fighter is a tough one.  And like five of the guys I saw wandering around had no shirts on.  Lucky bastards.

We discussed blogs in class today, and the prof asked who had blogs, and what did they put on their blogrolls.  Man, I don’t have a blogroll.  I read blogs, but a lot of them are newsy, political things.  Or completely ridiculous.  I guess I should make a blogroll.  I also want to go through and start tagging posts as to topic.  It’s hard!  Every single post is just going to be labeled “red hot inanity”.

Kathleen and I went to a talk on repaying student loans on Monday, which was super-informative and I will share my notes on it with whoever wants them.  Like twelve people from all of Dalhousie came, and three of them were from the library school, because we are awesome dorks.  The guy who put it on had a vocal cadence kind of like a movie thug, though, which made me think that Student Loans may have repurposed him from “collections” or something.  They have this new image, they’ve stopped cutting off thumbs and breaking kneecaps, they need to find something for this guy to do, as far away from a switchblade as possible.

Yesterday I was having a weirdly high self-esteem day.  I mean, my self-esteem is pretty high anyway, but yesterday it was just off the charts.  I really should’ve written some cover letters, but they might’ve gone badly.  “Why should you hire Shannon?  Because I rock.  I will rock the reference right outta your desks.  Call me, bitches~  Peace out, double kiss.”

I had the great brainwave today that we should all write cover letters for each other.  Because we’d be more relaxed, and it’s easier to talk up someone else than yourself.  Again, this might go badly.  “If you don’t hire Kathleen, I will come for you.  In the night!”

OK, I’ve added tags to this post.  Holy crap, are they inane.  I don’t know how specific I’m supposed to get.  I’ll go back and add them to my previous posts, too, when I’m feeling like avoiding homework sometime.  Oh, man, maybe I’ll even add that excerpt thing, a blogroll, and I’ll be like a fully formed blogger.

The Waterpolo that wasn’t

I was all het up to play some innertube water-polo tonight, and I showed up and our team wasn’t on tonight!  So sad!  I swam precisely one lap anyway, because my bathing suit was new and it was getting wet, goddammit.  Swimming in the Dal pool is less fun than the public pool with the nephews, because everyone swims in polite lines and I’m freaked that if I screw up a line someone will yell at me.  All I want to do is a cannonball.

Kickboxing!  This week is my week of learning new kicks.  On Tuesday I did some crazy hopping-on-one-foot kick that is really powerful once you get over the fact that you look like a cartoon character.  Tonight we did a variety of side kicks, which I was rocking pretty hard at.  Gerald was trying to get me to kick him with full power at chest-level, which is really hard.

In yoga, the instructor, Shanna, got me to try the sleeping yogi pose.  I almost got it, too!  I think I had my feet behind my head (honestly can’t remember), and I think if I give myself more time to work at it, I’ll actually be able to get my shoulders through my legs.  Sweet-ass!  It was so weird, anyway.  I was struggling really hard to get my shoulders through this circle made by my thighs, and just as I thought, “Holy crap, this is like I’m giving birth to myself” Shanna said, “Give birth to yourself!”  So I guess that’s the point of the pose?  I think the other point is that, if I ever get it, I need a photo of it to immediately become my new Facebook profile picture.

Some discussion of the art of job interviews, lately.  Some interviewers purposefully say mean things to test the candidate’s response to stress.  I think I should never perform interviews, because my version of this would be something like, “As soon as you sat down, and I looked in your eyes, I knew it was true love.  Fuck the job, just marry me.”  What else could I do?  Oh my, this could be fun.  “I need a kidney.  No, I’m not sick.  No, I don’t work for a charity.  Kid, stop asking questions.  Either tell me your blood type or get to the nearest homeless shelter with some ether and a hatchet.”

Also, if anyone reading this is ever in a job interview, and it’s going really well, and the interviewer says, “Well, informally, you have this job”, I will pay you money if you fart right there.  Juvenile, yes, but that’s what makes it so delicious.

Made valentines today in a crafternoon-type setting in the common room.  It will surprise no-one that my valentines are as ridiculous and stupid as everything else I make, but they have glitter glue, and dammit that is what’s important.  It’s the thought that counts.  And all my thoughts are of glitter glue.

Sushi Yummy

Just went out for sushi with Kathleen.  I successfully used chopsticks… depending on how loosely you define “successfully”.  I did not ask for a fork, which is, in my mind, a successful bout with chopsticks.  Stabbing in vain at the rice, crying in frustration, and finally eating it with my fingers is like success, right?  You’d be surprised how classy I can look while eating rice with my fingers… in my imagination KATHLEEN DO NOT RUIN THIS FOR ME.

Over lunch, we discuessed the idea of a $250 gift certificate to the liquor store.  I think I would go in planning to get, like, one really amazing bottle of wine, then come out with 25 $10 bottles of wine.  I would build a wine cellar, and take guests on a tour, and they’d be all impressed until they noticed it was filled with, like, Yellow Tail and Gallo Brothers.  Also, that my wine cellar is under my bed.  But then we’d get drunk on cheap wine under my bed and everything would be lovely.

Went out for drinks last night with numerous classmates for a “Semester is Finished” celebration.  Naomi and I came up with a plan for if I ever have a baby.  I’m going to abandon it at the mall, and it’ll be raised by the janitors and the staff at the Orange Julius stand.  And eventually my family will wonder why I never get them Christmas presents any more, and its because I can’t go back to the mall, because my baby lives there.  Anyway, we hit that point where we couldn’t stop laughing, but when we tried to explain the joke to other people they were just, like, That’s kind of funny.  So I’m memorializing it here, for you, Internet.

I did two presentations on Tuesday, which involved a lot of random analogies, like, “The search for the right collection management software is like the search for true love” and “So, if a tree falls in a forest, you know… can a robot really have knowledge?”

Wednesday was dedicated to sleeping in, window shopping downtown, and showing up to work and being told I could go home.  If I wanted to.  Um, yes please?  This is what lead to my being able to hang out with the classmates.  I’m still working on the weekend, so this was just a surprise day off.

This evening, I will go network with librarians and present myself as proper librarian material.  I need to make myself some stupid business cards.  Well, ideally, actually some intelligent business cards.  Not clever business cards, though; that’s too risky.  Staid, serious business cards, for my staid, serious business persona.  I’m frowning all serious-like as I write this.

Kickboxing!/Networking!

I had my first kickboxing class of the year last night.  Whoo!  I was worried that Gerald might get me to go over with the beginner’s, because I did the beginner’s stuff a whole year ago, but he let me train with the advanced side (where all my bootcamp friends are).  Yay!  So instead of boring myself silly getting shown the difference between a cross and a jab, I got to really learn something new (switch kick!).  And all that stair training over the summer really made a difference in my kicks, too.  I was feelings totes badass.

Kickboxing went from 6-7, and there was a networking opportunity at Dal right at 7 that I figured I should go to as well.  Kickboxing is on campus, so I brought a dress and blazer in my bag and decided to run over right afterwards.  “It’s the first day,” I thought to myself. “Gerald will go easy on us.  Surely I won’t get that sweaty.”  It’s like I’ve never met Gerald or something.  So I went and networked while spectacularly sweaty.  I used it as an opening line.  “Sorry, I just ran here from kickboxing.  Oh, I grapple, too.  Bellydance, also.  Yes, I’m terribly fascinating, you should hire me to work for the government.”

Anyway, networking was fun.  I talked to the legendary cataloguer from the Mount about their lesbian pulp fiction collection and the case of the stolen first edition Origin of Species (which goes for $100,000).  Also, when I said I grappled a lady said it must be hard for a “tiny thing” like me, which is objectively untrue but it’s nice that I’m in that area where I can be described as such by a stranger.  Whoo!

Oh my god, you guys, I made THE BEST veggie chili.  I have no idea how, though, because I just throw all this crap into a crock pot, but some of the weirder stuff I put in was: brown rice, barley, chives, steak seasoning, basil, cocoa powder, chickpeas, garlic, salsa, canned beans in maple syrup… I can’t remember what else.  I’ve also lost track of what normally goes in chili, so maybe some of this is normal.  Anyway, it’s ridiculously delicious and I want it all the time.  Just put all the beans in your house into a crockpot with chili powder, and all the things on that list up there (except the brown rice, cook that separately and add it later).  Et voila!  Oh yeah, also put in hamburger if you want.  Oh!  And pepperoni is really good in chili if you eat meat!  Holy crap, trust me on this!

I was looking forward to walking around all day today and it is raining so I’ll be over here, cursing the heavens, if you’re looking for me.