I invented the combat hug last night. A combat hug is when you attempt to do a clinch, but it turns out you suck at just everything, and you wind up in an super-aggressive side-hug, instead. Really, I bet I could’ve thrown some knees from there. In the ring, I’m sure inventing moves mid-match at least gives you the crazy edge. So, yes, combat hugs, tell your friends. Or just hug them!
I’ve discovered I’m generally too polite to kick my partners in the head, which is bad because sometimes they need to learn. I’ve got good hips, so if I can see they’re not going to dodge my headkick I’ll just kick over their head. I’m a bad partner!
I came up with a great joke! You know how Tim Hortons sponsors kids soccer teams? And those teams are called TimBits? And you can drive by a game and see all the TimBits running around? So… free range timbits! Boom!