The Tale of Anne and the Time-Door

It’s Christmas and no-one is reading this anyway, so I wrote another dumbass story!  Yay!

There once was a lady named Anne, because why the hell not?  Late one night, Anne tried to open her bedroom door, but the door wouldn’t open.  She looked through the keyhole, and she could see a bright sunny day through the windows, and a strange woman sitting on a strange chair, drinking a glass of white wine.

Obviously, time travel was happening.  So Anne shouted through the door at the lady, “Hey, what time is it?” and the lady was all, “I don’t know, noon?”  They had to shout really loud, because they were shouting across goddamned time.  So Anne said, “No, sorry, what year is it?  Year is the relevant thing, here.”  And the wine-drinking lady was in the year 2034.

Anne was absolutely terrified by this, but decided to try opening the door anyway, because plot is happening and Anne makes poor life decisions.  So she got her emergency battle-ax and went screaming for the bedroom door.  The power of poor decisions breaks down the time-door!  Huzzah!

The wine-drinking lady was pretty chill while a strange voice was screaming at her through her door from the past, but the sudden appearance of Anne with the emergency battle-ax was startling.  Unfortunately for Anne, Wine-Drinking Lady is a sorceress with an emergency combat wand.  Fortunately for Anne, Wine-Drinking Lady is really drunk and has bad aim.

The battle royale finishes when Wine-Drinking Lady realizes that Anne is her long-lost mother.  The two have a tearful reunion, and Wine-Drinking Lady joins AA now that she knows her mother never abandoned her, she just ran through a time-door.  The moral is, if you have kids, think of them before you rush headlong into the first bizarre anomaly you find.


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